The only words that can describe Australia’s innings are the sorts of words that I can’t say here.
It was that bad.
In fact, ESPN Cricinfo staff were so impressed, they did this:
Alas, it’s my sad duty to spell out the records Australia broke.
For the first time in his test career, Chris Rogers scored 0 runs in an innings. This sadly meant he wouldn’t end up with the record for longest career without a duck. He was the first batman dismissed by Stuart Broad, who ended up with an average of 1.87 for the match, the best of any 5-wicket innings against Australia. Rogers wasn’t the only batsman with the departed for nil experience, as 2 others in the top 4 experienced that, David Warner and Shaun Marsh. Stuart Broad took 2 wickets in the first over. Since ESPN Cricinfo started their ball-by-ball commentary in 2002, he’s only the third bowler to achieve that. On ball number 3 of the match, he took Roger’s wicket and joined the 300 club, becoming English player number 5 to achieve it. He took his fifth after 6.1 overs, the fastest of any bowler ever. ended up taking 8 wickets for the innings, all of them caught in slips. That haul of 8 is the most since Jim Laker took 10 in 1956. Funnily enough, 10 was the score Michael Clarke ended up getting, and considering he was one of the top scorers, surely that can be considered as a return to form. He wasn’t the top scorer, though. That was extras, with the total of 14. And it was all over in 18.1 overs.
Good job, Australia.